Love happens and then love ends. When love has to leave, you cannot just stand its way. As they say, there’s no stopping the inevitable.
Surviving the days after love is already gone is like taking a difficult exam you aren’t prepared for. You won’t be able to answer all the questions thrown at you. Worse, you won’t be able to answer any of them. There is nothing that can make you answer the “why”s. Eventually, you have to let go. But letting go is never easy.
Your heart will break. You guess around in circles realizing that you are unsure if you are running ahead or being left behind. All choices hurt and everything scares you.
And then one day you just wake up, still in deep pain but oddly determined to stop the inevitable. You want to bring love back.
You will be banging on love’s door but love won’t hear you the same way anymore. Love will never know how fearful you feel or how cold it is standing there outside that door. Love will never care if it suddenly rains and you’ll just be standing there soaking wet and drowning in pain.
Love will never be there as you beg for air. Until all the knocking stops. Until the silence is unbearable. Until the tears become irrelevant. Love will never be there.
And then you will drift as all of the things you feel turn into anger. You will walk away, slowly, and then love becomes distant.
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Distance will remind you of love every day. When memories come, it will fill your heart in so many ways that it becomes more painful to hate. Sleepless nights will last for several years as you make a list of all the things you and love have shared.
You will want to go back to that street where you last saw love. Even if your heart remembers, love will never be there. Love will be on another road, one that you can’t tread. And then the time will come when who you thought was love does not appear to be love anymore.
Know that no matter how hard, your steps will be steady again. One day, you will be at peace with the side of the story you were not able to hear. You will be looking forward for better days. The path will clear itself, turning the bumpy roads away.
New days will give you new routines, new hobbies and new faith. Songs will give you new meaning. Lessons will let you grow. You will learn how to stop scratching your wound and it will heal. And you’ll be surprised that all the things you thought you will never forget are now forgotten.
You’ll wake up not knowing love anymore. You’ll stop missing love. You’ll stop calling love. Love becomes mere memory. Love becomes past.
And the past ceases hurting you. You look at the scars and realize that there’s no way it could bleed. It will only make you remember. Without effort, your heart will choose for you. If you are open and willing, it will only keep what it can manage to keep.
Things will be all right. Your heart will be blessed with both joy and peace. You just need to let yourself be healed.
You know you’ve already forgiven when one time you cross roads with someone familiar. You’ll look at his face and realize that you’ve seen him so many times before. You’ll never remember how he never cared. You’ll only see how his eyes have once been the eyes of love.
You will recognize that person, that past, and you smile, as you say to yourself, “He used to be the person who I thought love was, but he will never be love.”
Because true love never leaves. True love never dies. True love never ends.
